~Ƭhε Pεrfεssεr 🍖💎

Today, we dance. 
Tomorrow, we dance again.

Spammin' In The New Year

rivers of blood run cold as night  
as anger swallows every soul in sight  
taken in greed the fucking "free" live in fright


Full size GIF (1920x1080 @ 145MB) here: https://gateway.pinata.cloud/ipfs/QmVpbsT8P24o76AjcWr5RrksJWuBEbE1vAZ3cf1ZjQDy8b

Every Last Drop

look at my office, isn't it neat?  
sometimes i sit at my desk and just eat  
but today daddy elon gave me a plan  
tonight i will become a richer man


ruggin America, boy aint it sweet?  
fly to the moon on this carpet with me  
it's a whole new world for the land of the free  
yea I'm ruggin America, have a burger on me

ol benjamins face is staring straight back 
and i can't help but think, id look good on that  
congress wont let me, cuz i look too darn funny  
so i'll just slap my name on fake internet money

ohhhh  
ruggin America, boy aint it sweet?  
fly to the moon on this carpet with me  
it's a whole new world for the land of the free  
yea I'm ruggin America, bitch you voted for me

Omnomnomnomnomnom these fries are fucking dry. Get me my god damn ketchup

Ruggin' America - Official Music Video

Nevermore are visions light
Set yours sails in the dark of night

1/1 animation to accompany the physical painting created for The Perfesser's "Dreamers Beware" layer of Cyber Watch [https://async.art/art/layer/0xb6dae651468e9593e4581705a09c10a76ac1e0c8-1212]. This is the AR layer of that painting. 

Caustic Nightmare

fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam fakespam

FAKESPAM

Purchase of this NFT gets you a REAL, physical shard of a 68 million year old Triceratops nose horn. This horn was collected in a private land dig in Hell Creek, Montana.

The back story: I broke a beautiful Triceratops horn that was on display! I was closely observing a Megalodon tooth when I stood up too quickly and backed into the display case behind me. I ended up purchasing it from the owner, complete with all of the shards that broke off of it. Now I have a cool Triceratops horn on my shelf and you get to have a piece of it, coupled with an NFT :)

The unlockable content contains the information you need to claim your physical shard of the horn. 

These fossil fragments will ship from the United States. Some countries have import restrictions on fossils, so make sure this doesn't apply to you!
Shipping within the United States is free. International collectors will be responsible for shipping costs. 

Tricera //SHARD (Includes shard of REAL Triceratops horn)

S.P.A.M.

SPAMSPAMSPAMSPAMSPAM

Born from the darkest corners of financial history, the L'esprit de Paris, an ancient spirit of financial ruin, has emerged from the annals of time with a sinister mission: to shroud Ethereum in despair and wage war on the very essence of decentralized innovation. 

LONG LIVE THE BANKS!

L'esprit de Paris

RARE SPAM

Artist: The Perfesser

Dreamers beware
These visions take flight
Haunting your soul
As you slip into night

This layer merges physical acrylic painting with digital manipulation, animation, and augmented reality. A large (24" x 48") acrylic painting was created, then manipulated using a handful of my favorite techniques to create the final layer states. The first state is the raw, unmanipulated painting.

The signed physical painting AND the animated NFT are included with the purchase of this layer! The animation was minted on OpenSea and will be transferred to the ETH address of the buyer. The painting will ship from the United States. It's a 24" x 48" (61 x 122cm) acrylic on canvas. I will happily ship internationally where possible. International shipping costs will be the responsibility of the buyer. Shipping an artwork of this size can be very expensive or not allowed to some countries.

This painting is *AR ENABLED* via ARTIVIVE. Scanning the physical painting (or a print) using the ARTIVIVE app will display an animated version in your world using augmented reality tech. 


Dreamers Beware - The Perfesser

Async Art

BΞYOND THE FABRIC 🌒

Foundation

KnownOrigin

Wash 'em 'til they shine like a $RARI 

1/1 mint. Acrylic painting on canvas by The Perfesser.

Physical piece included (14"x14"). Will be shipped to original buyer UPON REQUEST. (Will ship free within continental US). Contact me at perfesserings@protonmail.com to arrange shipping.

Full size hi-res image is a 7735 x 7736 PNG @ 70.7 MB
Hi-res download (IPFS hosted) included in Rarible unlockable content.

Alphabet Washing

Rarible

Look at all that tasty spam! Too bad someone piled it on a nasty keyboard. Who's keyboard is that? WHO RUINED THE SPAM???

---

This artwork is an interactive 3D object produce via 3D scanning with a mobile phone. 
File format: GLB  
File size: 49.2 MB

Spam on a Dirty Keyboard

so tasty. hang it on your wallet. put it in a gallery. throw it away. whatever. long live spamart.

.GLB file

Spam Roll Up

SPAMM3D

Dear RobnessV2,

McDonald's #64 of Paris: Louvre Center is excited to bring you on board as our new facilities hygiene manager. 

We’re just a few formalities away from getting you to work, but we are finding it difficult to get in contact with you. I called the number on your application this afternoon, but Jenny said I had the wrong number. Please call me ASAP at the number on my card.

McDonald's is prepared to offer a full-time position at a salary of 77 $TRSH per annum. Please note that alternatively this compensation may be delivered in the form of rare pepe cards, trash gifs, and/or Kraft mac and cheese (Blues not guaranteed...).

You will be reporting to Le Pak. [Our safety committee has investigated the white marbles stored on the floor and found them to be in compliance with the National Colour Avoidance Act of 2020]. You will start 2.7 weeks ago. [NOTE: chronological transport must be arranged by applicant.] 

Please indicate your agreement with these terms and accept this offer immediately. Be aware that we are unable to disclose any potential outcomes that may result from the rejection of this offer. 

Sincerely, Ser McTRASH

McTRASH

// welcome to contract 64
// experience with caution; collect with fervor

// a compendium of 2022 trash and cryptoart works by the perfesser

Contract 64

These hand-crafted compact discs were burned one by one with classic Windows Media Player, using specially selected HP (Hot Pork) discs. They are nestled delicately in the finest budget-pack jewel cases. Authentic Sharpie labeling. SIGNED.

*****

Purchase this token on the primary market to collect 1 of 13 *physical* Rare Platinum compact discs. These are real, playable CDs. Truly functional art. 

Collector will pay shipping and handling after purchasing the token. .0069 ETH to USA, .0420 ETH for international shipping.

Rare Platinum CD

Each of these cassettes was carefully hand recorded using a vintage cassette deck from the 1990's. Only the tip-toppest quality TDK SA (Spam Art) series tapes were selected to showcase this iconic album. 

They were each painstakingly hand-painted ​with legendary edition gold** paint and an ultra-premium Spam pigment. SIGNED.

ONLY 3 WILL EVER EXIST!   
First, Middle, and Last ;)  Which will you be, anon????

*****

Purchase this token on the primary market to collect 1 of 3 *physical* Legendary Gold Cassettes. These are real, playable cassette tapes. Truly functional art. 

Collector will pay shipping and handling after purchasing the token. .0069 ETH to USA, .0420 ETH for international shipping.

Legendary Gold Cassette - Spam Art Greatest Hits

Spam Art Greatest Hits

[THEANTISPAM]

Beware! Your spam is in danger.

'The children told a tale,
Of a figure dressed in black.
Who robbed the world of spam
And vowed to never give it back...'

MAPSITNAEHT

Are next year's bad vibes 😈

#badvibesonly
LONG LIVE SPAMART!

~Ƭhε Pεrfεssεr 🍖💎 (theperfesser)

~Ƭhε Pεrfεssεr 🍖💎 (theperfesser)

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