Ethereum

Final Narrative

Collection

Mondo Megabits

Description

Final Narrative - the calculation of the final outcome of the Universe (fake) with the total enterprise of all life on all planets as a quantifiable factor - must be constantly repostulated, reformulated, model projected and spell checked by interested parties at exponentially-increasing cost. The most efficient vehicle for this calculation is a special type of think tank org filled with semi-senient human computers which are networked together to create something effectively like The World's Smartest Man. The computers (drooling vegetable people, clones, lobotomized sex workers and kidnapped transients) are enormously expensive to create, and require a full-time support staff of caregivers, baby food chefs, massage therapists (for the bed sores), lawyers (to make sure it's ethical) etc... But, to The Powers That Be, the cost is an investment that ensures they get to stay well ahead of the re-formulation curve and the Potential Parallel Worlds Time-ConeTM (which reaps alternate futures from the realm of possibility at the Speed of Speed). Final Narrative organizations always set up their egghead engineer-mathematicians on the Fifth Floor or whatever building they're nominally "located" in. The lobbies are usually spiffed up for PR purposes, with a cute little coffee shop and visitor center, or perhaps a lecture hall hosting Narrative Outlook 101 (a free community series for the idigenous and disabled to get their feet wet in the exciting field of Narrative Study)... But then after hoofing it up a floor or two (the elevators are out of comish) it becomes clear from the disconnected phones and lack of organized human activity that you're in a shell game or some type of M.C. Escher-esque pinball maze. Where are the computers? There better be a fully-stocked bar at the top of these stairs. What the hell is going on, on the Fifth Floor? Didn't Happen; Can't Prove It Did; Debunked: Institutionally gaslight your opponent into thinking his/her last turn didn't happen. There are obvious stacks of paperwork to prove it and multiple expert witnesses including a best-selling author and a well-liked TV personality. Opponent's ex is a character witness for the prosecution: he/she is a narcissistic abuser who day drinks and plays fast and loose with the truth (bad credit score too). Remove all DMG and status effects caused by last enemy turn.

Traits