Description
What is consciousness?
Consciousness is the awareness of our own existence, the tapestry of thoughts and feelings that defines an individual, or an aggregate of people.
Yet in sleep, this consciousness fades. We lose the acute awareness that we exist. Our thoughts and feelings, the very essence of who we are, seem to slip and give way to memory and hope and fear.
But what is sleep, to rob us so effectively of these elemental pieces of ourselves?
Why do we cling so tenaciously to consciousness as the core of our identity?
Are we truly ourselves if we lose consciousness so easily?
Does Alzheimer’s morph us from one individual into another, capriciously? Does Parkinson’s slowly build a prison cell, trapping the true version of a person within unresponsive neural pathways and plaques?
Am I the neural pathways, or the neurons failing to reach their destinations?
When I lose consciousness each night and regain it in the morning, am I still the same ‘me'?
When my father looks me in the eyes, is it the same 'him' who once expressed pride in my independence? Does that pride linger within? Is it still a part of the collective consciousness, the past, present, and future being that is my dad?
If I sleep, can I cease to be me?
By losing consciousness, can I transform into someone else?
Anyone else?
I keep trying…
in 15-minute chunks…
30-minute spells…
Striving to become a different version of myself.
To lose myself and emerge anew, better than before.
A nap to shift perspective.
A doze for a brighter outlook on life.
Sleep to escape despair, hoping that upon waking, acceptance takes its place.
Can we ever truly know each other if each time we sleep, we drift from one version of ourselves to another?
Can I ever truly know myself? Each morning, I awaken as a new 'me', a fresh amalgam of thoughts and feelings, each set unique, each consciousness a distinct snowflake in the blizzard that is ‘me'.
How easy it has become for me to step away, to liberate myself from the burdens of being 'me', as I eagerly let consciousness slip away. I welcome the relinquishing of control as I let myself drift away nightly, telling myself that tomorrow, when I am me again, my thoughts will be clearer, my actions better, my self improved.
A better me, through not being me.
"Consciousness"
1280x720 px 24fps 264dpi 2:53 video
Midjourney, Procreate, Procreate Dreams, Videoleap, Beatleap, Garageband, Photomosh
22 hours, January 2024.
Created and Minted for #avunion Lost & Found.